How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
