we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
