Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Randomize
