yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I touched a dick in church today
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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