i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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