In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
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