If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
