I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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