I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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