Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
