Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize