There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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