This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
