I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
