Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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