paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
you would pick up someone in the library
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
