Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Randomize
