this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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