After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize