that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
