Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I wanna passion pit in your ass
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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