I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Randomize
