i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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