I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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