that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
