Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
