R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Randomize