I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
