you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I wish i was in the wii world.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
