The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
