sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
