I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I CAN MOONWALK!
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
