It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Randomize
