make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
