I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Damn victory sex feels great
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
