I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
