Swine flu. Run for my life!
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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