i don't plan on having that self control this summer
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Rumble strips road head = magical
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
