Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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