My friends, they love my intelligence
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize