So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
