It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
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