I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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