Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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