he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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