but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Your penis caused this!
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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