i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
honey bunches of taint.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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