if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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