He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
