Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize